__________`` the never-ending LOVE and the wonderous feeling i-just-feel-like-saying-i-love-you words * " ________*`` ____

Tuesday, October 17, 2006

been thinking alot these few days.. there's this uncertainity within me.. really unsure should i get a job while schooling.. seriously not that i wish to say.. i really dun know how my parents think about it.. im really tired about all these financial issues u know?? one day i might just explode in front of u guys which i dun wish to show it.. cause i know it will cause even greater trouble for all of us.. maybe i should ask around my friends and see if they got jobs to recommend not.. e most i just check out e newspapers daily and go to shops and see if they need helpers not.. i seriously dun want more of such troubles..
can someone please stop me from my craziness??im cant hold on anymore.. i feel so trapped within my own problems.. though i know well enough that life is actually a problem but cant all these stuff be solved?? man.. just hate it right now at this moment.. simply just cant go back to e me that i used to be.. why is it so hard to smile from e bottom of my heart now?? well maybe i can do that without me knowing.. forget it.. i will go ahead with whatever i can do and let God do e rest.. i am getting sick of this kinda life help me before i go out of control soon!!
haiz.. e trouble is first my dad.. then my mom.. only my sister is e best now.. to me she's just e best.. after so many years of living together.. only this year im beginning to cherish her properly cause she's my only sister.. yeah if ya reading this.. i just want to tell ya.. will treat ya even better than in e past :)

theperson im loving (:
10:22:00 PM